currently, on a friday.

"Each day, our partners make many attempts to connect with us, both verbal and nonverbal. World renowned couples research, Dr. John Gottman calls these attempts “bids” for emotional connection. A bid can be a question, a look, an affectionate touch or anything else that opens the door to connection. In his research, Gottman reports that a happy couple can make as many as 100 bids over the course of a meal! There are three responses to a bid for connection: turning toward, turning away and turning against.
1. Turning toward. This means to react in a positive way to your partner’s bid for emotional connection. Research indicates that over time, these couples develop stable, long-lasting relationships. They also can access humor, affection and interest in each other during conflict. They can stay connected and not let temporary negative feelings destroy the relationship.
2. Turning away. This response is essentially ignoring or avoiding the bid or acting preoccupied. A consistent turning away response leads to defensiveness and seems to result in early divorce in married couples.
3. Turning against. Couples who turn against each other’s bids for connection appear more argumentative, critical and sarcastic. According to Gottman’s research, this style leads to divorce in a majority of cases, but not as quickly as couples who more habitually turn away from bids."- SOURCE

Made this piece of art inspired by John Gottman and this DIY. I just bought the letters from Target ($2) and found this printed canvas at a thrift store ($2) and a can of spray paint (.97). I used a gold sharpie to color in the A in Darling. The phrase was chosen for the reason stated above, as a reminder. It is so easy in our day-to-day to forget to nurture each other and seeing this reminds and inspires me to be the right person for Marc. I think I am going to start watching thrift stores for these canvases. Marc wants to paint more to hang around the house. It not only reminds us to do these things for each other, it reminds us of who we are and want to be. This one is hanging in our room, I love it. Oh and the gorgeous Pothos there? Marc gifted me that yesterday. Took Ocean grocery shopping and came back with it. It's the little things.

Wishing it were Summer time. Sun-kissed skin, tank tops, cutoffs. Pretty sure this is a constant thing for me, dreaming of Summer time, but this time it's bad. It's like baby fever or something. I just want SUNSHINE!
Feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have a tendency to overcommit and try to make everyone happy. This is such a bad thing for me, I end up stressed and angry and not enjoying my time. Whether it is blogging or just life in general, I always anticipate that I can do more than I can. I am trying to accept that I am human and it doesn't hurt to say no.
Anticipating Marc and I getting away. We have yet to have a weekend away from both girls, we are both anxious for that time but I don't want to rush either of them. We played by ear with Ocean and she has no problem spending weekends away from us. Luna isn't ready yet so we are patiently awaiting that time, but eagerly anticipating it. We are both nomads at heart so we can't wait to adventure together.
Decorating our room, still. It's taking awhile but I think we have figured out what we want to do and I can't wait to start. I think we may spend our evenings next week decorating/painting our room.

Reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho - Jazmin gifted it to me and I am really enjoying it. The cover of the book is incredibly beautiful.
Writing a post on body image and a few about marriage. Specifically, creating a sense of "we" in a marriage. A post on blogging is coming as well, tips and such. 

Wearing the same pair of thrifted skinnies that I have been all week. They are stretchy like leggings and it works if you want to feel put together but still be comfy. Also, loving my geometric earrings! They have become my pearl earrings. Basic and they go with everything.

Hoping to see my friends from Auburn soon! We have made a lot of friends here and have a little community formed. It's something we never had in Auburn and it brings a lot of joy into our home.

 The five-to-one written here is also a reminder from John Gottman. 
"What Gottman and his colleagues have discovered -- and summarized for popular audiences in a new book, Why Marriages Succeed or Fail (Simon & Schuster) -- is mind-boggling in its very simplicity. His conclusion: Couples who stay together are . . . well . . . nice to each other more often than not. "[S]atisfied couples," claims Gottman, "maintained a five-to-one ratio of positive to negative moments" in their relationship. Couples heading for divorce, on the other hand, allow that ratio to slip below one-to-one. If it ended there, Gottman's research might remain just an interesting footnote. But for him and his colleagues, this discovery is just the beginning. In fact, Gottman's novel and methodical approach to marriage research is threatening to turn much of current relationship therapy on its head. He contends that many aspects of wedded life often considered critical to long-term success -- how intensely people fight; whether they face conflict or avoid it; how well they solve problems; how compatible they are socially, financially, even sexually -- are less important than people (including therapists) tend to think. In fact, Gottman believes, none of these things matter to a marriage's longevity as much as maintaining that crucial ratio of five to one." - SOURCE

Making plans for my mantle. I finally painted all the boxes and I am so happy with them but I can't figure out where I am going.Y'all send me your ideas! #firstworldproblems

Planning my vlogs! Got an idea? Anything you would like to hear me talk about or share? Let me know. Talking to a screen is awkward when you don't know what to say.

Some of our best friends are visiting for the weekend, so there is bound to be lots of cheese and champagne. I couldn't be more excited. What are you doing this weekend?